How's love begin.?

When I’m alone I like to think about myself in the past there were many sadness around me I was born and lived with it I knew I will make dad disappoint at me even I was the only one son…I can’t make him proud of myself so I always live in my shell try to hide of the real me inside. Everyday passed by so hard for me ..I tried to be good do whatever they expected from me even had girlfriend to make them happy unfortunately it didn’t work ‘cause it’s not myself only friendship I can give her we ended with understanding I didn’t want to block her with her good ahead future it was only 2 months of friendship…

Since then… I keep living in my shell my world all alone I had only one closed friend “Kota” who I loved we’re like twin unfortunately he’s so famous in school and he’s not only for me while he had me he also had another cute girl..his cheerleader yes she’s really cute much more than me I knew that well I knew he would select her to be his girlfriend she can help him look perfect in public…..but not me..what do I have for him.? Nothing I can’t stand in front together with him I’d made him look worse ‘cause of wrong sexual ….yes I have nothing and not worth for him in everyway but I still love him still want to keep this sad love with me….Kota also knew this too I knew he also love me ……but for his future he must choose her so we’re separate since we graduated …..goodbye my first love…….I understood him but my life was getting worse at that time I had no one to be with..no one to understand me..no one to accept me..so what can I do.? I thought if I didn’t have value for anyone then why I had to live on.? I lived with sadness for a couple weeks..Yes this question..this feeling came to me over and over together with my weak health then I decided to suicide one day when I was alone by taking too many pills…. I wanted to end my unhappy life…… my disgusting life but I didn’t have luck ‘cause mom came earlier she took me to the hospital…I knew mom cried a lot I knew I upset her but what I should do if I didn’t mean to anyone..although mom saved me this time but I’ve never stopped thinking to do it again I was back in shell again..silent..lonely and dark…

Then one day this guy came into my life…..Ryosuke… the guy who pulled me up from sadness he spent much time to make me talk to him ..he came to visit me everyday talked to me even no feedback from me ..I didn’t know what he talked about even I looked at him but my ear my heart was closed like I didn’t have my soul I knew later that Ryo also sad to see me like that but he has faith that he can help me and he felt he has to have me ….a day passed by....a week passed by …a month passed by… The time had changed but Ryo’s never changed…. he still came to see me around lunch time everyday he brought his lunch to eat with me everyday until I had to go back home the last day in hospital that I started to talk to him ‘cause he asked my permission to visit me at home I was insecured and confused ‘cause I don’t know myself…. but I didn’t feel lonely when I saw him so I said “If mom ok I was ok” so this is the first step of our destiny….

Ryo’s never changed he still came to visit me at home and talked too much as usual but all about me….like how I am…..what I had for breakfast..what I did …bla..bla..bla.. he could make me smile more often he also asked mom to call me I knew mom liked him a lot too then one day while we’re watching movie he suddenly said to me “Naoto aishiteru” I didn’t say anything…I just so quite the sad memories return back to me..Did he say he love me.? Why.? Was I good for him.? Did he know what it mean.? All questions appear in my mind that made me quite I guess Ryo understood my thought all he said.”Naoto.I knew what I’ve just said and what it meant all the time I felt I love you at first sight I knew that you were hurt from your first love but pls don’t block me pls gave me a chance to proof my love let me had a chance to take care of you until you didn’t need me anymore”..he grapped my hands put on his heart and said “Naoto..I gave you all my heart I would do everything to make you happy I promised to erase your sadness.” it was so touchable moment for me it was so romantic time ever had I didn’t say anything just only smiled to him then he kissed me ..softly and long…

And this was the beginning between Naoto and Ryosuke…. a couple gay who decided to live together..decided to proof that we can love and beloved ...we can be happy as normal marriage people ...only we’re both men…gendre can’t block us from happiness but love can be with everyone ..every gendre...if you’re brave enough you only have to open mind....open your heart…..don’t throw your chance away…don’t block yourself…don’t close your heart…..there are still having good things around you..

LET'S LOVE BE WITH YOU..

❤❤ 愛しているよ！！❤❤